Dionysus and the Mad Women

 

Many years ago I used to write plays with songs for our younger pupils at school , P7, S1, S2 in Scotland, 7,8,9 in England. The one called "A Near Myth" told the story of Proteus, Melampus and the women of Tyrins. I am quite pleased with this song, where Dionysus is sent from Olympus to drive the women of Tyrins mad. Tune: "Magnetic Rag" by Scott Joplin.

Dionysus and the Women of Tyrins

 

DIONYSUS:               Call me Dionysus; I’m full of nice surprises.

                                    Drinks for every day, drinks for work or play.

                                    Blow away your troubles with effervescent bubbles.

                                    Just one more glass or two cannot hurt you.

WOMEN                     Dionysus, we love you so (Repeat)

 

DIONYSUS                Doctor Dionysus; my medicine is the nicest.

                                    (I won’t tell them yet there’s a side effect.)

                                    There’s no need to worry; don’t be in any hurry.

                                    Don’t even stop to think; just have a drink.

WOMEN                     Dionysus, we love you so.  (They drink)

 

DIONYSUS                That is enough. Now you’ve had your fun.

                                    I’ve got you trapped. Now my task is done.

                                    Time to pay the price of your drinking bout.

                                    Alcohol is poison, you’ve just found out.

                                    My medicine now will your brains devour.

                                    I am a god. Now you feel my power.

                                    Think of every nightmare you’ve ever had.

                                    There’s no escape; you’re going mad.

 

WOMEN                    That is enough. Now we’ve had our fun.

                                    He’s got us trapped. Now his task is done.

                                    Time to pay the price of our drinking bout.

                                    Alcohol is poison, we’ve just found out.

                                    His medicine now will our brains devour.

                                    He is a god. Now we feel his power.

                                    Think of every nightmare we’ve ever had.

                                    There’s no escape; we’re going mad. (Exit WOMEN)

 

DIONYSUS               I am Dionysus. I think this joke is priceless.

                                    I just love to see mortals on a spree.

                                    Don’t be sympathetic; they’re really just pathetic.

                                    When Dionysus calls, who can resist?

                                    Dionysus knows the way.

                                    Dionysus calls the play.

                                    Dionysus night or day.

                                    Dionysus rules, OK!

 

History pieces that support Advanced Higher courses

 

My history pieces on Kindle are brief, (shorter than a book, anyhow), not at all superficial (based on over 40 years of studying, teaching and examining) and cheap (about £1.00 each). They are intended to provoke thought. Some of them fit closely with some of the topics that people study at Advanced Higher, so I have listed them here.

 

Field 3 – Scotland: from the Treaty of Union to the Enlightenment 1707-1815.

The Jacobites (Lectures in Scottish History Book 6) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

An Introduction to the Scottish Enlightenment (Lectures in Scottish History Book 1) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

Field 4 – USA: A House Divided 1850-1865

Slavery and the Causes of the American Civil War (A-grade History Lectures Book 14) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Books

 

Field 6 – Germany: from democracy to dictatorship 1918-1939

Hitler's Rise to Power (a-Grade History Lectures Book 2) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

 

Field 8 – Russia: from Tsarism to Stalinism 1914-1945

The Russian Revolution of 1917 (A-Grade History Lectures Book 3) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

 

Field 10 – Britain: at war and peace 1938-1951

The Causes of the Second World War and Appeasement (A-Grade History Lectures Book 4) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

 

Why did the Allies win the Second World War? (A-Grade History Lectures Book 11) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Books

The Secret of Eilean Mhor

 

I hope that after you read this you might buy the book. It costs less than a pint of beer and is available as an Amazon paperback – or Kindle if you prefer (even Kindle unlimited). Let’s start with the link to it.

 

The Secret of Eilean Mhor: Amazon.co.uk: Harris, George: 9781910693322: Books

 

A few years ago we had a family holiday on the west coast of Scotland. My grandsons loved it – the beach, the woods, the hills. In fact we have had a holiday somewhere on the west coast maybe a hundred times in the last fifty years. I thought I would write a book about it.

 

I made it a children’s adventure story because of my grandchildren. Inventing and telling the adventure plot was fun, and I think it worked. As my daughter said to me later: “He’s reading your book right now. He can’t put it down.” But I was also keen to include all the bits that can make a holiday on that wonderful coast such a pleasure, for adults as well as for children. There is boating, hill walking, searching the machair for flowers, a Highland games, swimming, playing on the beach and exploring wild woodland.

 

One child whom I did not know at all – daughter of the friend of a friend - said to me: “There’s only one thing wrong with your book. It hasn’t got a sequel.”

 

I decided to make my own illustrations. They may not be great art, but they do show exactly what I wanted. The clachan with its island is invented but the mountain they go up is real. Readers can feel they are in Moidart. I could have used photos of the area, such as these.

 

(No spoilers, but a cave and a washed-up telegraph pole are important in the story)

Designing an Amazon paperback tested my new skills to the limit. The pagination of one or two of the chapter headings isn’t quite what I was after. Otherwise it is a very handy little book. It would make a good present for a young reader.

 Reviews by friends of the author can’t always be trusted, of course. That’s why I was so pleased with the opinion of the unknown girl who wanted a sequel. Here also is an Amazon review by a completely unknown purchaser: 

“A great adventure mystery story, set in one of the best places on earth - the west coast of Scotland. Would recommend! Thanks for writing this, it was amazing.”

There was also an exchange on Bluesky with the Arthur Ransome Society, and I was very pleased when they said this: The 12 Ransome books are for all ages. Setting of yours is a modern 'Great Northern?' while having baddies like S&A does. Later aspects of your book are more for older readers - can't go into details as it would be a plot spoiler. Like Jon Tucker's 'Those kids' you blend modern technology in well.

 

 

The Spirit of Christmas - A carol

 

I write a satirical column for our church magazine. My motto comes from Desiderius Erasmus: "What is the matter with telling the truth with a smile?" I have just written this carol which, I hope, makes some serious points beneath the fun. The three characters have had their personalities developed over three decades but I think it is clear from their verses what their attitudes are. I hope some of you know "HMS Pinafore" and will be able to hum along, or even burst into song. 

A Trio for Christmas: Tune – “Never mind the why and wherefore” by Sir Arthur Sullivan (abridged)

 

Thumbscrew Widget:      Let’s give thanks for Christmas frolic, often very alcoholic,

    Twelve whole days of getting plastered going on through Hogmanay.

    Carol singing, bottles clinking, Christmas is a special day!

All:                                          Celebrate the incarnation, boisterously or meek and mild.

                                                What a cause for celebration! Joseph, Mary, and the Child.

 

Seth the Preacher:           There’s too much of Christmas frolic, often far too alcoholic

                                         Just commercial exploitation, all awash with gin and beer.

                                         It’s the Roman Saturnalia. Cromwell had the right idea!

All:                          BUT…..  Celebrate the incarnation, boisterously or meek and mild.

                                                What a cause for celebration! Joseph, Mary and the Child.

 

Parkin Slipshod:               All enjoy the Christmas frolic, whether dry or alcoholic.

                                          Kings or Shepherds – even Angels – mark the feast in your own way.

                                          Even if you don’t like turkey, Christmas is a special day.

All:                          SO…….. Celebrate the incarnation, boisterously or meek and mild.

                                                What a cause for celebration! Joseph, Mary and the Child.

 

Coniston Landscapes

 My next exhibition will be in The Institute, Yewdale Road, Coniston. Saturday and Sunday, May 20 and 21, 10.00 - 6.00 Monday May 22, 10.00 - 4.00. It is in aid  (50/50) of the Mountain Rescue Team. I have only twice had to call out the Coniston MRT, when I have met other fell walkers in difficulties, but I can think of no better cause for lovers of the Lake District fells. 

There will be large paintings, medium-sized paintings, small paintings, hand-painted cards, Christmas cards, and post cards. 

Prices - well, original paintings can't cost nothing, but these will be far less than gallery prices. There's no need to buy anything anyway (though I hope you will). There will be plenty of ways just to donate lots to the MRT.

Coniston Water is, of course, the main subject in many of the paintings. 

But there are many pictures made from high on the fells - mostly in easy walking range of the village.

The little corners, appreciated as you walk past can be just as important to a lover of the district as the wide vistas.

Almost all the pictures are of the Coniston area, but I am lucky to have a possible place to stay in Borrowdale as well.

There is a wide variety of seasons and weather conditions.

Some of the pictures are of places I have loved to play for nearly 70 years. All the paintings are either from sketches, or from pitching my easel on the spot. All the paintings include vivid memories for me. There will be well over 50 paintings.

I do hope you will be able to call in. It will be lovely to see you.

Remembrance

I am in the remembrance business. After decades teaching about both world wars, and taking many trips to the Ypres Salient, November 11th is not much more special than any other day. But the annual focus on remembering those who fought in both wars, and since, is very important. We are not required to judge one way or the other, but to remember.  

Four of the pieces I have published on Kindle are about the two world wars and their causes. This year, 2022, I am making them free on November 11, 12 and 13. (If you can't wait, or if you have missed those dates, don't worry; they only cost about £1.00 each.) I usually describe them as "brief but not superficial". Here they are, with links.

The Causes and the Course of the First World War

This is, as its title suggests, two separate sections. The second section does not in fact deal with the whole course, but with the specific question of why Germany lost.

The Causes and the Course of the First World War (A-Grade History Lectures Book 10) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

Scotland and the Causes of the First World War

I was invited to give this talk in 2014 by the Colinton History Society, and I knew I must do a good job for them. On the one hand I reviewed how my own understanding of the causes of the war had changed and developed during my life, in the light of published material available. On the other hand I looked at the Scottish experience; in particular I researched newspapers of July and August 1914. I think the result was interesting.

Scotland and the Causes of the First World War (Lectures in Scottish History) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

The Causes of the Second World War and Appeasement.

This is another piece that was originally written as two separate lectures. The first looks at the world-wide causes of a world-wide war. There was a lot more going on than Britain versus Germany. The second goes through a series of points about the specific policy of appeasement. It is notorious for not working, of course, but there were many reasons for following the policy which looked good at the time.

The Causes of the Second World War and Appeasement (A-Grade History Lectures Book 4) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Kindle Store

Why did the Allies win the Second World War?

As a student I developed a reputation with my supervisors for a style of writing that said a great deal in a few words. I can hardly believe that this piece covers such a massive subject in so few words - but it does. It will not take you long to read a very great deal about the Second World War. Of course the War could be a life-time study, and still not complete at the end of it, but you have to start somewhere.

Why did the Allies win the Second World War? (A-Grade History Lectures Book 11) eBook : Harris, George: Amazon.co.uk: Books

 

Magnificat

Service With a Smile by DES

“What is the wrong with telling the truth with a smile?” Desiderius Erasmus to Martin Dorp, 1515

 

 

Culture Clash

 

The Episcopalian watchdog, OFFbish, has received the strongest possible hint from the new Prime Minister that, among other things, churches must not make political statements and must on no account attempt to radicalise their members. The letter from 10 Downing Street continues:

 

“In particular we note that every Sunday evening – indeed weekdays as well in some collegiate foundations and in cathedrals – you are guilty of this practice. You oblige the congregation to sing, or to listen to, the words: “He hath put down the mighty from their seat, and hath exalted the humble and meek.” We would be prepared to accept the excuse that this dangerous doctrine arises from our Levelling Up Agenda. But it is a gross distortion of it. It is similar to suggesting that the free speech to which we are committed allows you to say things – woke nonsense, for example - of which we disapprove. However, later on in the same rabble-rousing chorus members are encouraged to sing “And the rich he hath sent empty away”. Not only is this clean contrary to government policy, it is clearly a most dangerous clause to sing in churches. Imagine if children, or other weak-minded people, were to take it at face value?”

 

And so OFFbish has instructed the Council for the Reappraisal of the Anglican Prayer Book to retranslate the Song of Mary into more politically acceptable language. As The Not Very Reverend Parkin Slipshod (Platitudinarian) explained: “Biblical scholars are increasingly aware of the need not to take the imagery of the Gospel writers literally. The word “rich” clearly does not refer to money, dividends or party donors, but is, rather, a metaphor.”

 

DORP: What rubbish!

 

DES: You will also, my old friend, be pleased to hear of the efforts to tempt more people back into the churches by re-examining and, if necessary rewriting, some of the more difficult passages of holy writ. The project has not got far, but one awkward verse has been recast thus:

“And another of his disciples said to him: Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father. But Jesus said unto him: Would it not be better to wait until he is dead?”